I thought it was home! It is still Home.

As I approached, I met your gate open
I walked in and found your doors open
I walked in and found so many people
You offered me a seat
I took it but felt uneasy a bit

You asked me to relax
You began telling me facts
I felt better and began to adjust
I felt comfortable and started to blend in
Then I felt it was easy to fit in

I rushed to where my heart led me
Maybe it was so soon but I let it be
I wanted to give all of me already
Even though I was far from home
I felt I had walked into my home.

My new home felt so warm
I felt love so much like I had just been born
Soon I started feeling uneasy
Maybe it had become hot but I was cold
I was treated already like I was too old

The love faded and reality came to light
I felt like I was in the sun, hot and bright
Was it too much, I didn’t want to judge soon
I know God won’t give me more than I can bear
But this is His house, I shouldn’t fear

Then I realized He lives among men
I became confused right then
I felt I should walk away for a while
Then I thought it could be a test
I can win if I give my best.

The heat became more
The pinches and bumps made me sore
I was sick and started to dread this home
I felt I should run away from it all
My heart, head and conscience had the ball

In their court I found no rest,
So I decided to give one try my best
Did it solve anything? No!
They started hitting me with words
I felt I bled like I was struck with swords

I was treated like a leper
Like I was just worth a paper
They wanted me to fit in
They tried to make me bend
The tried making me blend

I couldn’t because I’m unique
They couldn’t see because they don’t think
They feel it’s the norm to walk in and blend
I thought I was home but it was a den
Vipers, foxes and lions mixed up as friends

I decided to force myself to fit in
A round hole for a square peg to be in
It was so hard and one day I realized
No matter how hard I squeeze I won’t be round
Someday they’d look but I won’t be found

The competition, the fake smiles,the side talks The struggle to be noticed, the fight to please others That is not who I am I couldn’t fit into those shoes and still walk Knowing these things just bothers me

I decided to be Me,
I decided to be invisible
I decided to hear but not listen
My grandpa said the most unsafe place is the church
I used to wonder why he said such

Now I know so well what he meant
Maybe he read it or it was what he felt
This is no more scary but it’s wisdom
God is love and dwells in his church
But on earth men make up the church

The heart of man no one can know
Don’t let your guard down Do not forget the devil goes to church
In His presence be free But don’t leave your senses running free

Don’t be afraid if you don’t fit in
Remember the standard for that was set by man
Look to God and do all for Him
He accepts you and loves you
Just the way you are before Him.

If you feel judged don’t judge
Be unpredictable, you’d always surprise them
They’d never understand you’re still the same
They Say, they do, don’t mind such

Let your heart guide you
Use your head to navigate through Love will always win, God is love
Don’t fight any one and don’t seek fame
Remember your secret deeds don’t weigh the same

In God I still find a home
I still feel warm when winter comes I still stand tall and fearless
He loves me for me
I’m not in the wrong place, now I see

God’s house is like a tree
Birds and other animals live and feel free For different reasons they are there For some it is home, for others it’s food
Stand firm and know God is good

He will never leave you, don’t feel alone He will always be there for you Be there for Him too Someday you will be gone He will open another door to welcome you.